Why is it called peanut butter?  On a gray rainy day, I was extremely bored so I began to ponder this complicated question.  Why not peanuts butter?  Just as I was so close to give it all up, the answer came to me.  I remembered how a couple of friends of mine pronounced FACTS.  They pronounced it as FAX.  So they would pronounce PEANUTS as PENIS.  I think that’s the reason why it’s not called peanuts butter.  Who would want to ask a store clerk, “Excuse me.  Could you tell me which aisle your penis butter is in?”  Or even worse, “What would you like for lunch today? Honey.”  “Penis butter sandwiches!”

Did I say I was bored?

As it turns out, I am not the first bored person trying to resolve this fatal question.  Penis butter has been clearly defined on Urban Dictionary.  The French came up with it.